Polyvagal Theory and Healing from Childhood Trauma

Those who live with the after-effects of severe childhood trauma understand well how it feels to be continually on the lookout for danger. Some experience this as hypervigilance feeling unsafe no matter who they are with or where they are in life. Polyvagal theory does a wonderful job of explaining these responses as well as [...]

The Physiology of Fear

Recently, I wrote a piece about maladaptive fear and someone asked me to explain the physiology of it. Although I am certainly not an expert, and no one fully understands the physiology of fear, I shall endeavor to do my best to explain it in detail. Please, forgive me if I get something wrong and [...]

Maladaptive Fear the Most Primitive Emotion

Fear is a necessary emotion that protects humans from harm by alerting us to danger and enabling us to respond through the fight/flight/freeze/fawn response. However, when fear becomes chronic it can disable people and cripple their lives. In this article, we shall examine fear, its source, and what can go terribly wrong when it is [...]

Facing Thanksgiving and Christmas After Childhood Trauma

Every year people in the United States gather with their families to eat turkey or ham and enjoy each other’s company. However, for those who experienced childhood trauma growing up in a dysfunctional home, Thanksgiving and Christmas are torture as they relive the holidays of the past. This article will focus on why the holidays [...]

Living as a Man with CPTSD: My Brother’s Struggles

Although I am a woman and have only an outsider's view of how men suffer when it comes to toxic masculinity, I am going to write a rather personal piece. It’s the story of how my brother Mike is bombarded by society to be someone he is not and what that treatment does to him. [...]

The Many Physical Effects Leftover from Severe Childhood Abuse

I’ve discussed lately some of the emotional effects child abuse and neglect cause adult survivors, but what about our bodies? Now I’m going to answer the question how does childhood trauma impact us physically as adults? First, we’ll explore the long-term physical problems brought on by the harm perpetrated against our bodies, then I’m going [...]

Grieving Over the Childhood That Never Was

Discovering you have a severe mental health problem, such as dissociative identity disorder (DID), causes a lot of chaos in a person’s life. You feel betrayed by your own mind and often afraid of the parts of your psyche that make you who you are. However, the fear and chaos experienced when receiving the diagnosis [...]

Having a Disorganized Attachment Style Negatively Impacts Lives

Our readers may remember, we are doing a series on attachment styles. While no one fits neatly into one category or the other, we all have one that is dominant over the others. Attachment styles form in childhood and impact us the rest of our lives. That does not mean you cannot change how you [...]

Your Motivation: Keep Walking

Hey everyone, welcome to a new day. The ads are gone! Hurray! I had a glitch with my WordPress account but they have a marvelous support staff and they fixed it for me. Yep, life is a neverending string of events, some are good and some are bad. Dealing with the ups and downs of [...]

Waiting for the Other Shoe to Fall

Life as a multiple has many aspects that we share in common with others who live with the diagnosis of dissociative identity disorder. But besides the existence of alters and the chaos that brings, I think the anxiety that comes with DID is one of the hardest. The anxiety I’m speaking about here isn’t from [...]

When Fantasy is Your Only Friend

***Possibly Triggering Material*** Growing up in an abusive home, children often find they have nowhere to go and no place to turn. So, they turn to their imaginations to help them cope. I’m writing this post out of my own experiences with the pretend world I lived in as a kid. I’ll try not to [...]

Attachment to the Perpetrator

In my research that I have been doing for my book on attachment disorders, I was reminded of a subject I believe I have yet to tackle here on this site. Attachment to the perpetrator sounds like a disorder on its own, but it is the natural consequence of children who are being reared by [...]

The $64 Question

What Is It About Childhood Trauma that Causes DID? Today I’m going to touch on the subject, what it is that causes dissociative identity disorder? That, as you may have guessed by now, is a subject that has many dimensions ranging from attachment problems and a missed developmental stage to our bodies being flooded with [...]

Being an Invisible Child

I am facing my forty-year graduating class anniversary dinner in August. Such an event usually causes people to look forward to speaking with and seeing the people with which you went to school.   For me the prospect brings back memories and emotions that are not lovely.   I can remember moving to Illinois from [...]